by joel martens –
When cofounders Steven Shyne, Vince Dwyer and Marvin Hanashiro attended the outrageous Red Dress Parties in other cities, they wondered why San Diego did not have a philanthropic event like them. Especially when they saw how much event resources impacted organizations that serve the local HIV communities in which they were thrown.
Rather than wait and wonder, the three decided to take it upon themselves and bring the signature event to San Diego. So, they launched a crowdfunding campaign and within 10 days hit their $10,000 goal. Armed with that seed money they formed a nonprofit, the Think Red Project, and put together the first Red Dress Party San Diego in October 2015. Four years later, the event has grown, along with what they can donate, all while fully remaining a volunteer organization.
Longtime attendee Josh Ramirez shared his take on the event’s success.“What makes Red Dress Party special for me is that it brings a light-hearted approach to a serious cause. Just buying a ticket for Red Dress Party, people are actually donating and helping raise money for the organizations that service the local HIV community.”
The popularity of the event is undeniable and as someone who has also attended regularly, I’ve thought long and hard about why it’s such a hit in so many places.
For me, it’s something that ties back to being a little kiddo and the fascination I had with my mother’s wedding and prom dresses. I thought they were beautiful. I learned early on to be very careful about sharing that part of me, because the consequences for liking things considered “feminine” was nowhere near pretty and usually involved pain. Different times, different social mores… Thank god we’ve at least evolved a bit.
“Try not to take yourself too seriously and simply have fun, since the party is all about being brave, letting loose, and raising funds for a good cause.”
Those changing social mores are a part of why I think these Red Dress events are so popular all over the country. It’s a little gift we pass on to all those little sensitive kids who weren’t always treated so kindly, a way of honoring the delight they learned to keep so hidden. Maybe too, a celebration of their defiance and how hard they fought to hold on to the people they were, in spite of all that negativity.
Interestingly enough, when I went to my first Red Dress event in Palm Springs years ago, I refused to wear a dress, and was caught off guard by how difficult I found the idea of putting one on. Those old, ugly judgments echoed in my head and just like they had when I was a child, they brought me to my knees.
Fast-forward to the first Red Dress Party San Diego. The same shame and struggle reared, but luckily I, along with the times, had evolved. I remember thinking, “Fuck this, I’m going to wear the most sparkly, outrageous dress I can find and I’m going to love it. So that’s exactly what I did. I found myself a full-length red sequined number, with a train that left a trail of sequins in my wake! I and my bevy of friends, both straight and gay, had a blast that evening!
What we choose to wear does not define who we are, just what we like to cover ourselves in. Be it a suit, a thong or a bright red dress, it’s about self-determination and becoming who you want to be and not caving to rigid, sexist ideologies. It’s like RuPaul once said, ”When you become the image of your own imagination, it’s the most powerful thing you could ever do.”
Marvin Hanashiro offered this when asked what advice he would give to those attending this year: “Try not to take yourself too seriously and simply have fun, since the party is all about being brave, letting loose, and raising funds for a good cause.”
Red Dress Party San Diego’s theme for 2019 is “Big Top” so get your circus-themed outfits ready, ladies and gentlemen! The party takes place Saturday, September 14 at the The Port Pavilion on Broadway Pier, 1000 N Harbor Drive, just look for the new Ferris wheel! For tickets and more information, go to reddresspartysd.com.